There's some hoes in this house

And I see them, so let's point them out...

So there is big talk about Ali Lohan (Lindsey’s 14 year old sister). Apparently she had a “accidentally” (See: PR stunt) auditioned with a porn director. She 14, the closest she should be to porn is on her computer, I mean that’s how old I was when I started lookin at it…online, lol. Who am I kiddin; I came out the womb with a Playboy in my hand. But seriously, why the hell is she talkin to porn directors? Isn’t her mom her “manager” and I use that term “loosely” because I think Dina (is that her name?) is only doin it for TV and I “use” the term loosely because that’s what comes to mind when I hear the word Lohan. And “use” is another word I associate with Lohan, as in drug user. Lol. Ali looks like she is 14 going on 25. Nasty, but how else is she suppose to upstage her lesbo sister? Dina, you fuckin up the lives of your girls. Kill yourself.

In other adolescent fuck ups, it seems Miley Cyrus has had more of her private photos “leaked” (See: PR stunt to appeal to a mature audience). I ain’t givin ya’ll the link to see her in her underwear because I think I would be arrested for child porn, lol. This were I split on my debate on actors/athletes being role models for kids. I feel that no famous person should be held to the standard of being a role model, just cuz they famous. They still people, crazy like you and me, and I sure as hell hope I’m not some kid’s role model. BUT, BUT, BUT if what you do is targeted to kids (like your fuckin TV show is on the Disney channel), then you have to be careful with what you do, because those no parent having, hopeless ass kids is gonna emulate you. So Miley, Put yo clothes on and holla at me when you 18 and your body is ripe for the pickin! Where were these hoes when I was in high school??? I was too busy studyin I guess lol.

And even the CW network is gettin in the mix with slutty teens. The new ad for their show Gossip Girl has once again caused everyone to throw a fit about how they are sellin sex to get people to watch their show (See: PR stunt to boost ratings). I don’t really wanna hype the show up, so I won’t be givin ya any links, but you know how to use Google. Or you can read a book, save some brain cells. Or better yet, you can send the link to this blog to all your friends (all 2 of them, who probably read this already lol). Merry Christmas.

Johnny Cupcakes just opened up his LA store. The line was supppa ridiculously long (that’s what she said) and while I’m no cupcake fan (clothin or phone boning, but I’ll fuck with the baked goods); I do respect the design of his clothing line. I mean, it’s better than that Ed Hardy bullshit (which is designed by the same talentless muthafucka who gave us Von Dutch). One thing I like about fashion is that you don’t have to be hot, just exclusive. If you can keep your clothing line catered to a specific group of people, you are money in the bank. NOW, if other people decide to buy your clothes that’s an added bonus. But if the wrong segment buys your clothes just out them in a magazine article (right Timberland? Just like how we built America, we built your company you cocky bitch ass muthafucka!!! WHO ROCKS TIMS???? WE DOOOOO!!!! White people don’t even wear boots; they wear sandals….even in the snow AND I’VE SEEN IT! So FUCK OFF!)

This is what I would like to do to the irresponsible people I just ranted about:

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

The Rant Is Due Muthafucka!!!

Hey don't sue me: That cupcake is actually a trademarked image of Johnny Cupcakes