Pickin up the pieces

If you watch Family Guy, then you will recall an episode where Peter becomes a social commentator and has the spot “You Know What Grinds My Gears”? That’s who I feel like- like why is this idiot rambling? O because you love it, that’s right lol.


Shia LaBeouf was not the driver to cause the accident Sunday morning. It appears that the other driver ran a red light and knocked over Shia (or as we call him in the hood, Baby Shy Shy)’s truck. Upon further questioning of the driver, police found out that she was attempting to get Optimus Prime to transform for an autograph. Lol, not really.

We had a nice little (modest sized) earthquake today in LA. My first one, technically my second but I slept through that one. It was thrilling. I was sitting down outside my mechanic’s garage and he’s a hefty dude so when stepped out my car the ground started shaking. I was like “what the fuck did this man do?” Then I noticed the signs and lamp posts shaking and I was in awe lol. It was kinda scary but I wish I was standin up so I could do a Max B and “ride the wave” owwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

Speaking of hefty, looks like the new Facebook has gotten wider. I like the better organization but I feel like it stretches things across the screen more. O Facebook, you could be run by Hitler and people would still use you. Viva La Facebook!

And in other hefty news, it appears that the city of LA will restrict the construction of anymore fast food areas in the southern part of LA (that’s were all the blacks live). I think that’s cool, since it seems like blacks have the highest rates for diabetes, high cholesterol levels, and other diseases. Goodness, you’d think the people that help build this nation would be a little healthier than that. We need to start eating African food again and walk for miles with buckets of water on our heads again, lol.

Speaking of sick blacks, did you know that if all the black people in the US formed their own country, we would rank above Ethiopia (420,000 to 1,300,000) and below Ivory Coast (750,000) in HIV population? This is why I don’t fuck with black girls, lmao, just kiddin. It’s not the AIDS, it’s the attitude lol.

And right after this report was created; the Feds decide to apologize for slavery. Now they realize how much they fucked over black people. Hopefully they will apologize for crack, greasy foods, and AIDS in this clause as well. I feel the only proper way to pay us back is through reparations, just like on the Chappelle show. I mean, it’s not like they won’t get their money back. Best way to stimulate the economy is by giving us niggas MONEY!!! Lol. Cuz I know if I got an extra 20K, I’m gonna buy me a baby. CASH!

So I had to lick my fingers!!!


The Rant Is Due Muthafucka!