I need some fans

Drivin around today and saw an occurrence that blew my mind. Twice today I saw white people speedin past cops. I couldn’t believe my eyes. I was doin about 75-80 when I saw the cops, so then I would slow down to about 60-65. But the other guy would just zoom right past!!! Fuck that, I ain’t even tryin to test my luck. Hell, the other day I got a ticket for driving. Cop pulled me over and asked for my license and registration. He didn’t say anythin when I asked him what the problem was, he just handed me a ticket. I asked him what it was for, and he was like “driving.” I said a DUI? DWI? He said nah, just driving. At the same time a car was driving down honkin the horn. As the car passed by, the cop and I look over to see a white man mooning the cop. I mean he had his ass cheeks all spread out….it’s crazy out here in LA I tell ya.

They’rrrrrrrrrrrre baaaaaaaaaaaack. Google is still on its mission to take over the world. Next stop: internet browser. Google Chrome beta is coming out today at 3am PST. I read the little comic book they created explaining Chrome and I LOVE IT. It looks totally excellent on paper, but I really can’t wait to try it out. I don’t wanna bore you with technical details but it looks like it’s going to be a very stable, app driven browser which is what we need in this land of Web 2.0. Leave it to Google to finally get it. Seriously Microsoft, what the fuck are you doing over there? So glad I didn’t get hired by you.

Rumor around La-La land is that Wacko Jacko is messin with Slut-o Pam-o. They prolly just had a lunch to discuss plastic surgery techniques and who’s the best doctor for which procedure. I think Jacko wants to get his boobs done so that he can start breast feedin kids lol.

The GOP did their little convention thingy crap today. I’m not gonna take up too much space with what they spoke about but I will mention this. Lieberman is a bitchass nigga. I don’t trust anythin Mr. Benedict Arnold says because look at the first three letters in his last name…..Second, why is everyone hyping up the fact that McCain wanted more troops in Iraq????? There are still people in this country that are for this “war”? Didn’t we run outta insurgents and are now just killin regular Iraqi citizens? Is there any real reason for us to occupy Iraq outside of being able to launch a quick attack on Iran? Is Iraq ever gonna share it’s oil with us? Tune in next week for the conclusion. Same Bush Time, same Bush channel. And if you vote McCain, you can watch this show for at least the next 4 years.

So everyone knows about Palin’s daughter being 5 months preggers and being an unwed 17 year old. I knew about this since Friday (my roommate is secretly havin an affair with Obama, so it's all politics over here), but it’s not an issue for me. How she governs her home and our country are two different things. Children make mistakes. Her husband having a DUI…same boat, not really an issue on how to run the country. Her sex tape? Lol, kiddin, but I can’t wait till that gets leaked. I’m buyin 2 copies…one to watch and the other as a collector’s item lmao.

Two Jamaican hurdlers have been implicated in a steroid ring….and we will wait for the other shoe to drop as everyone looks at Bolt lol.

Glad to see at least one country in Africa is keepin it real. “Tens of thousands of bare-breasted virgins competed for Swaziland King Mswati III's eye on Monday in a traditional Reed Dance.” according to reuters.com. That is what I need to get back to. The essence of an African man. When I blow up and get rich (which is a matter of time and not a matter of happening), I’m gonna throw an annual festival in which butt naked broads will compete for my affection. Then I’ma sell it to VH1 as a reality show called I Love Naked Bush Women, lmao. Done.

Here is a clip of prostitute training camp. This is the “Running from the cops” drill:




RIP Don LaFontaine…In A World full of stupid politicians, disgusting psychopaths, and pompous celebrities. One Man takes on the duty of reporting the bullshit to the masses. His name is The Tenant. This winter get ready for an action packed hilarious blog as The Tenant brings to you on a daily basis, his view on this fucked up world. May God help us all. Look for The Tenant in…
The Rant Is Due Muthafucka!!!


Coming soon to a website near you.

My neighbors are crazy

Everybody loves Kung Fu fighting….them cats is fast as lighting. Hi-YA! Been watchin some old school kung fu flicks…you know, the ones with the bad dubbing. I think Tarantino needs to make a movie like that. And you know he’d do it justice. It would be done on that old school film, with bad dubbing and terrible editing. Lol. I’m supposed to be headin to a Heineken party tonight, so I’m just bullshittin now because I’ll be too tired later.

So it looks like Angie (Jolie) is ready to adopt another kid. Wow, really? Like really Ang? You not even gonna breast feed the twins first before you go adopt another kid? O I forgot, you have hired breasts that will feed your kids. She needs to keep all her nutrition to herself before she faints again with her frail ass. I think the woman is spoiled. She doesn’t have natural births, she doesn’t change all they diapers. She doesn’t have to play horsey for all of them at once. That what Brad and the help is for. I wonder what Brad is thinkin? He left Aniston because she ain’t want kids, and now look what he got himself into. At some point even he has to say enough, let’s deal with the ones we got. But I ain’t mad at Ang, she’s just building her little army which will be 50 kids deep before she dies. Could you imagine 50 kids running around with the Jolie-Pitt last name? Talk about watered down legacy lol.

So there is this obese man on death row, who feels due to being a fat ass he should be put to death. He’s too big for an electric chair, and it would be hard to find veins in his blubber. I say put him on a treadmill till his heart explodes lmao. Fuck him. You know why he’s on death row? For raping and murdering two young women in 1986. I hate the interpretation of the Constitution sometimes. Cruel and Unusual punishment would be making him go on a diet. He would dread that. A bullet in the head? That seems fine to me. Make him everyone’s bitch for a week then shoot him? Even better. If you guilty (and I mean the “yea I did it, and I enjoyed hearing the screams” type guilty), then fuck any fair treatment. You are no longer a citizen of society; you should not be protected by the Bill Of Rights. You’re a monster, and should be treated like one. Hmmm maybe we can find a loop hole here.

Other monsters in the news, a pastor is found guilty of murdering a man and spending his wealth. I don’t really have much to say, Fresh Prince, what do you think?

My thoughts exactly. Same goes with the Texas man who had kids as young as five takin part in swinger events. Sigh, who do I shoot first? I guess the Texas man, but what the fuck kinda sickos go to a swinger party like this. I woulda been like “Umm, ‘scuse me, I don’t mean to be a downer, but am I the only one that noticed that these girls have no tits and no stubble? I mean, I’m only 5’9” but I’m pretty sure these girls can suck my dick standing up. We gots to go!” Now if I was in the Philippines, this would be normal because Asian women tend to be shorter. All the years of workin in a sweatshop stunts their growth. Proven fact, Wikipedia it, lmao. Nah but seriously, how? Yuck.

Woman in Inglewood sues the city and Police Department for killin her baby. Granted her baby was 19 years old and holdin a gun (aimed at the cops according to the police), I used the phrase “killin her baby” because that is how all mothers in LA talk when their child has been killed, whether the nigga was 5 or 55. Now this is gonna be a case of "Cops says, they says" in which the court will side with the cops. But if that dude was really holdin a gun and aimed at the cops, what the fuck was he thinkin? Cops will shoot you for reachin for yo wallet!!!! A gun? A gun? If she’s gonna sue the city it should be for Assisted Suicide because that’s obviously the case here lol.

Here is a dosage of crazy for you:

The Rant Is Due Muthafucka!!!

Hey Don't Sue Me: That image of the Fresh Prince belongs to NBC, who is owned by GE. Yea that's right, the same people that power your TV put the shows on it too!! That's a company.