Bill Clinton went to N. Korea and laid his mack down

The second black President couldn’t get it done, so they had to call up the O.G. How gangsta is that? Yo, there is nobody else in the United States government (that isn’t military) that coulda got those journalists any smoother. It so reminds me of the Jaime Foxx stand up when he was jokin about Bill talkin to Osama:

N. Korea is actin up again

Oh N. Korea, what are we really gonna do with ya? The government issued a warning for people to stay out of the Sea of Japan from June 24th till July 9th because of military exercise. Of course they will be testin their short and mid-range missiles which may not be a threat to the U.S. but still…The U.S. is tryin to down play it which might be a bad sign because they hype up fake threats they can beat, but never talk about real threats. I mean they’ve sent defensive measures around Hawaii - an action taken by Defense Secretary Robert Gates and approved by the Pentagon. So if the world realizes that they can’t reason with North Korean leader Kim Jong Il, what is the next step? Do we just blow them out the water? China won’t like that at all (neither would any country that views the Western culture as intrusive). So talks won’t work. War won’t work. The increased sanctions have only led to more aggressive behavior and I wouldn’t put past the Koreans to do everything except fire on a country. If I was the leader of the “free world”, I would just sit and wait. What else can you do? Sometimes a kid will test the parent by actin out, and sometimes you just gotta ignore them. But when they take that one fatal step, you beat the shit outta them!!! I’m talkin extension cords!!! And that’s what we shall do to N. Korea when they fire that missile that lands just right outside of the shores of Japan. So to Kim, keep playin like you know what you’re doin.

N. Korea is actin tough

Reports are comin in that N. Korea is makin progress with their nuclear program. Last month’s test resulted in an explosion of several kilotons which seems like enough to rain on anybody’s parade. News like that helps me to sleep better on the west coast. I think that’s why Obama has decided to soften America’s image. He is movin us away from the “meddle in everyone’s affairs because we are bigger and stronger than you” to the “America respects all governments even if we have different ideals” country. Some (see: GOP knuckleheads) think that this approach makes us more susceptible to attacks. I think if there are any groups that wanna cause us harm, they are gonna do it whether we come out beating our chests or talkin softly. The problem is information is too readily available. We can’t bluff like we used to. Everyone knows our financial woes. Everyone knows how we fucked up in Iraq. Of course there are things that they DON’T know but what they don’t know won’t stop them from attackin us. And what they don’t know won’t stop them from preparing themselves. I think that Obama’s approach helps because it brings everyone’s guard down. When former President White Devil was in office a lot of world leaders were on edge worried about which country would the U.S. invade next in the name of “fighting terror”. And if you’re being accused of harboring terrorist, you’re gonna do what you need to in order to protect your country (like testing missiles and nuclear weapons). Do I think we should allow Iran and N. Korea to have nuclear programs? Eh, I’m not in bed with the leaders and don’t know their true intentions. But I don’t think makin threats or using sanctions and embargos is the way to go. I’m more of a “speak softly and carry a big stick” diplomat. And the quote is a West African proverb. Them blackies are so smart!

N. Korea just wants some love

So is that what’s it all about? Lil’ boy wants to wear daddy’s shoes? Please. I say we starve them out. While the people in N. Korea may lack knowledge of the outside world, I’m pretty sure the government officials don’t. And when we can promise wealth for them, their families, and countrymen, it’s only a matter of time before Kim Jong-il gets his ass Valkyrie’d.

Obama can't stop Korea

Ohhhh North Korea. What are we gonna do with you? I hope someone drops a nuke and destroys the testing facilities. But seriously, what are we gonna do? Sanctions? Those only work if everyone is on board. War? Ha, that’s suicide. I guess it’s time to let NK into the talks and start showin some respect. Then once we have it, we invade them and burn it to the ground!!! AH, thank goodness I don’t work for the U.N.

N. Korea tortures journalists...with spa

Considerin how SHITTY we treat our prisoners, I don’t see what the big deal is about. At least the reporters are HAVING a trial, fair or not. What were they doin on the border of China and N. Korea anyways? I see a sign that says ‘Beware of Dog’, I stay my ass on the other side of the fence. I’ll wait till the owner says I can come over. Those ladies are livin the life over there, I’m done makin this an issue. Next post please…

Good times in N. Korea

This is a second interview in which someone that visited N. Korea said it’s not as bad as everyone makes it to seem. We do have to take his accounts in with a grain of salt tho seein how most of his trip was orchestrated. Hopefully more trips will allow us to slip in an assassin, I mean, allow us to work together and defuse the tension between N. Korea and the rest of the world. However, N. Korea isn’t makin easy to be liked. They just kicked out U.N. inspectors from the country and plan on startin up their nuclear technology. This right off the heels of a missile launch? No psychological sense mannnnn. But like I said, better communication is key to keepin everyone safe. N. Korea needs to come back to the table and talk, while the rest of the world needs to stop treatin them like a bratty teenager.

N. Korea just wants some Aretha Franklin

Soooo are we gonna invade N. Korea? Why don’t we ever fight people worth fighting. We pick on Iraq and Somali pirates but don’t fuck with Iran or N. Korea…people with actual balls, who would push the button. Sigh. Politics. So what happens if N. Korea builds a nuke, then what? Most likely they’ll think their nuts is as big as ours and will start demanding more PT (playin time for my non athletic readers). Meaning, they’ll prolly just want to be included on more talks, will want the sanctions to be lifted, and basically treated like an adult instead of a tween brat. On one hand, I feel like N. Korea should be able to do what they want. Nobody sanctioned us when our President went to war with Iraq. But considerin the fact that the entire world hates N. Korea (besides their communist buddies), I’m thinkin somethin might be wrong with the country. Sigh, can’t we all just get along? If we’re just hating on them because they’re communist then I feel for N. Korea and other communist countries because I can understand the pressures of people tryin to tell you what’s best for you. AND I HATE IT. I hate when people think what worked for them should work for everybody. They treat life as a fad diet and guarantee results for everyone. Well everyone’s situation is different. So while communism may not work for the greedy Americans, it most certainly works for the humble Chinese. Matter of fact, communism has worked SOOO well for them, that they bought America. Ironic isn’t it? Anyways, somethin tells me that N. Korea just isn’t stable and this is not just about methods of running a country. Well one thing is I do feel safer with Obama (just not when it comes to matters in Africa….smh) and I’m pretty sure we’ll figure out a way to deal with N. Korea and make sure Japan doesn’t turn into an archipelago.

N. Korea fired the missile

I don’t really know how to address this. On one hand I don’t want N. Korea blowin California to smithereens (is that how it’s spelled?). Kablowy! Lol. But what do you do? Do we go in a start blastin the N. Koreans? We ain’t got time for that or the strength. It’s a recession and the last thing I wanna do is spend money on a drawn out war. Can we just nuke the place? Lift a ban on nuclear weapons. Last time we nuked a place, we made new allies (how’s it hanging Japan?). Why not try it again? Super nuke. Just level the country and leave it in ashes. Then S. Korea can take over and it will be just Korea again. But seriously, what can anyone do? Shake a finger at Kim? More sanctions? The first sanctions didn’t work, what can we do now? Cut off their water supply. We should make a huge microwave like in Batman Begins and just run it through N. Korea and take away their water. Then we can sanction water to them. Yeahhhhhh, maybe I’ll do it and make N. Korea my vacation country!

N. Korea will fire missile soon...

All I know is if they decided to shoot a missile at Cali, I’ma go to N. Korea and kill all the cats and dogs and produce a famine in the country. Lol, seriously tho. We need to send over 10 big booty strippers and let Kim go to town. That’s all it’s about. Pent up aggression. Get him some ass, and I mean some real ass not that Korean pancake ass, and this will all blow over. Literally. Thank goodness I’m secretary of blogging and not defense or state.

N. Korea turns nose up at America

“We are not Guantanamo” and that pretty much shuts up America in any convo concerning imprisonment. It makes it hard to be World Police when you beat up on suspects. Nobody is gonna fuck with you, help you, or respect you. If there is one reason I’m glad we voted a Democrat in, it’s for the shutting of G. Bay. Wow, you know Bush and Co. really fucked this country over when N. Korea can throw in a good jab about us. Why does the white reporter say “I’m proud of you” like a Korean couldn’t go to the University of Georgia and become a doctor? He’s Korean not black.