Kaká and Ronaldo team up

Good newsssss for Real Madrid fans. Not only did ya’ll get Kaka but add Ronaldo to your list! Do you know how much these mofos dropped on these two players? $132 milli for Ronaldo and $92milli for Kaka. AND THAT’S JUST FOR THE PLAYERS! No talks on how much they paid their agents or how much they paid the previous clubs to release them. Obviously the recession hasn’t affected European futbol. Since my roommate is a Man U fan, we’ll most likely still follow them next season. Me? I pledge no allegiance to a team, just to a player, and will prolly player more attention to Real next year. I’m more of a nationals follower than clubs because with clubs the amount of green limits the caliber of your team. One team can buy up the best 11 players in the world and that would be fine. Kinda wack to me. So I like watchin the World Cup and the qualifying matches…that’s where the real action is for me.

Ronaldo ditches Madrid for Paris

Good news Manchester United Fans!!!!!! It appears right after being traded, Ronaldo celebrated the best way he knew how, and that was by clubbin it up in LA. And guess who he was with? Parasite Hilton…I really gotta stop callin her that, she’s prolly a sweet person with a horrible disease. Anyways, reports have come in that Ronaldo and Hilton were in full make out session and he ended up back at her place for the night. All this means is that Ronaldo will become horribly sick and end up suckin next season. OHHHH WAIT, we’re talkin bout Cristiano Ronaldo. I thought we were talkin bout St. Ronaldo the Priest with his own TV reality show – “So you think you’re holier than a priest?” (on BBC, check your local listings). Then everythin is just fine. Ronaldo is no stranger to prostitutes and sex, so I’m pretty sure he’s caught everythin you could catch and still be an athlete. He’s prolly caught some shit that would kill a normal human but due to his excellent physique and conditioning, it prolly kept him in bed for a weekend. But bein seen with Hilton? That’s still gross. If I looked like Ronaldo, I’d only bang out the finest nuns in the world. Wait, which Ronaldo are we talkin bout again?